better best forgotten

some things are better best forgotten.

never these words became truer for me than now. i am letting go of the past. along with the people i've met. these memories/things were not exactly horrendous but the things underneath the smiles and waves were the ones that's cursing me right now. i didn't know that for the past years the genuine love and support that i gave was repaid by jealousy and stubborness and pride and hate. i've never met someone such, until i met _. Never again will i allow myself to be part of _'s charades, and never again would i give concern and genuine human feelings. never i again would i be generous enough to wallow with _, in the dark and share _ pain. Never.

so now, _ would never recieve even a slightest bit of friendship from me. i will not be rotten towards _, in fact i will be civil. i am not up for revenge, i am up for forgiveness. i will never be like _, because i will never forgive muself if i became _.

i am not trying to be clean here. i am far from clean. i myself am "muddied" with sins and "dirtied" with bitchy-ness. but there is a limit to what i can take and as far as i am concerned here... _ have cross the line.

enjoy your life. live it to the fullest. and hope that pillars that _ standing on doesnt break, with a soft cushion to break _ fall.

happy life to us all.