savvy.

savvy...

nearly...

i can taste it.

the bitter aftertaste of a sweet marmalade (thesis defense)
the gnawing and thawning pain of seizures (media law)
and the stirring and slurring sensation of a roller coaster ride (businessjrn)

we are so close to the end.

+++

its been a while since i last blogged. gawd. i've been busy. im wishing for all of this to finally end and be lifted off the agony of college life. so much stuffs been given to us... its like our professors decided that we should give them extra hard time, before they go... this year is the most painful and yet rewarding year in all of my education year. because this is the last straw. there is no turning back.. you cannot undo the mistakes you did. you cannot stop train to adulthood now, its now or never.

im pretty scared of my future. im not really sure whether i want to be an adult or not. i want to keep on studying. keep on learning. i still wanna hide behind my mother's shadow, scared of the future and the real world. but... if im gonna be like this for the rest of my life, then im a useless matter occupying space.

but one things for sure, i wanna study more. i wanna take up culinary arts. i wanna cook, and feed people.

i wanna be stuck in a hot kitchen concocting delirious muffins, delectable pastries, i wanna burn every inch of my hands in coming up with the most sensous and tingling food. i wann be just like that.